(trigger warning for rape, victim-blaming and negligence, slut-shaming, and suicide)
I received this email a couple of days ago. I redacted a few identifying details, which I italicized for reference.
Dear Jess or whomever,
I know this email is not some republican conspiracy theory, but as a Tumblr that I wholeheartedly respect and admire, I’m writing because I need help, I’m writing because I, as someone who had faith that people could be sensible, that things like this could be avoided here in (state) via proper education, I need help.
In October, my friend was dragged out to a fraternity party with one of her friends, and it was at this fraternity (frat name) here at (college), in (city), that she was brutally raped. Her screams muffled by the music.
Her consequent visit to the health center resulted in a denial of a rape kit because they “didn’t believe” her. When she persisted and they took her blood, her blood work was lost and there was no record of her ever visiting. Her friends, in a sorority, afraid of how this would make Greek Life look, encouraged her not to say anything, to try and “forget” about it.
Scared and alone, she did not go to the police, she did not go to the doctor, and now, five months later she came to me, overwhelmed, suicidal, and in desperate need of some kind of solution, something to let her sleep, to stop the guy’s voice from uttering the hateful horrible words every single night over and over.
We’re lost. Should I write to the ACLU? Where do we go form here? She can’t really recall his face and her mind is blocking everything out from the trauma. I’m doing everything in my power to comfort her, and her parents are looking for ways to call out the university for negligence, but there has to be more.
I’m so SICK of this atmosphere of rape culture and victim blaming. Other guys from the frat constantly call her a whore on campus, tell her to “fuck off” and that she’s a “lying slut.” How, how on Earth is this possible, acceptable even? I don’t understand. If there are any resources you have and any suggestions please let me know. Her friends and family are already deeply involved in an effort to bring justice and to help her though this rough time, but I can’t lie awake at night and know that this guy walks around convinced he did nothing wrong, that people are constantly blaming her. I could go on with how wrong everything is, how this world can be such a horrible unequal and ridiculous place. So here I am writing you, wondering if there is anything else I can do, any way to bring attention to the fact that (college) blatantly ignored the brutal rape of a young woman.
Readers, I’m going to look into this as much as possible, and I need your help. What are some resources for rape survivors? What groups could we contact on behalf of the victim? Do any of you know of any Greek-specific groups pertaining to rape issues? Let me know.
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